The Dating After Divorce Hinge Review
Is Hinge the best app for Dating after Divorce?
What’s the best dating app to use after a divorce?
I get this question AT LEAST once a week.
Hinge has been a consistent source of quality potential dates for men and women dating after a divorce. Full disclosure - I use Hinge for most of my clients when I run their dating profile through my dating profile management program.
Shameless plug → Schedule a free consultation with me if you’d like to get new matches weekly, without the hassle of using the dating app.
Quick Hinge Overview
Hinge refers to itself as the “app designed to be deleted”. Hinge is a non-swiping dating app (yes, they exist!) that was first introduced to the public in 2012. The app was designed for millennials and Gen Z in mind. In fact, almost 50 % of the app’s users are between 30-49. It’s the 3rd most downloaded dating app in the United States, coming in behind Tinder and Bumble.
Hinge Pros:
Hinge is known for having fewer fake profiles than its swipe-app competitors.
A large percentage of Hinge users are seeking a long-term (serious) relationship, not a hookup.
You can comment or like directly on a photo, video, or prompt. This gives you more opportunities to personalize your opening.
Ability to video chat from the app, allowing you to see if the person ACTUALLY looks like their photos, without getting off the app. Because there’s nothing worse than not being able to find your first date at a restaurant because their pics are THAT old.
Hinge Cons:
As a free user you’re only allotted 8 likes per day. If you want more likes you have to upgrade and pay to become a preferred member. Preferred membership is around $30 per month.
Users can set their location from anywhere. Which can mean that the person you’re talking to might not actually be near your city.
If you accidentally skip a profile, you can’t “undo” it or go back, unless you’re a preferred member.
Hinge is less user-friendly than other dating apps. If you accidentally set your age wrong on Hinge. It cannot be changed. Also, the app lacks the quick swipe feature which allows you to bypass matches you’re not interested in quickly.
Hinge For Those Dating After Divorce
While every divorce is unique, everyone follows a common journey as they begin dating after divorce. Dating apps have a time and a place on this journey, just be careful when and how you use them. Below are the three main steps to dating after divorce, and my opinion on using Hinge during each of them.
Step 1: Transitioning From “We” Back to “Me”.
Your divorce is final and you’ve taken a deep breath. Now you must go from “we” back to “me”, exploring who you really are and what you want. Sorry to be the bearer of bad news, but someone’s got to be. Now is NOT a time for dating apps!
Jumping straight into using a dating app like Hinge wouldn’t be fair to yourself (or the other person) in the long run. I suggest resisting this urge to get out there right away, as it can cause a lot of emotional damage. Instead, focus on healing yourself. Here’s a free resource that can help.
Step 2: You’re Ready To Casually Date.
Once you’ve done the work and decided to get back out there you’ll probably be looking to see what’s out there. Casual dating (especially after being with one person for a decade or more) can often help you figure out what you really like or what you don’t. This is an important part of getting back out there!
Along with dating apps like Hinge, I encourage my clients to start a new hobby post divorce, to help meet people who otherwise wouldn’t have met. It also allows you to put yourself out there but in a comfortable setting.
Step 3: You’re Ready For A Relationship.
Looking for a future partner is a BIG task. That’s why I recommend taking your time while casually dating instead of jumping directly into something serious post-divorce. Once you’ve had time back in the dating world you might start to feel ready to find a partner.
Hinge is a great app to facilitate potential relationships. That being said, not everyone you meet on the app will be looking for the same thing as you. Dating online can be difficult. This is why leading with honesty and transparency is the best way to convey what you’re looking for both for yourself and your potential partner.
Relationships - even new ones - can be complicated. When that first rejection as a newly single man or woman happens, just remember that you’ve been through worse. You got this.
Final Thoughts
I recently had a client tell me, “There is no blueprint on how to get divorced at 45 and start dating again with two kids under the age of 10.”
The truth is that there is no blueprint because it’s different for all of us. BUT with a little assistance and redirection, we can help make the dating process a little less WTF.
If you’re getting back out there and wonder if it’s the right time, check out my article for some advice on how soon is too soon to date after your divorce.
Bonus Round
Here are my 5 Tips to Make Your Profile Stand Out on Hinge:
Your main picture should be of JUST you - looking your best and in focus!
Show off your personality with what you love doing. Hobby or outdoor activity photos are great!
Use the prompts to introduce a little about yourself without being too formal (examples: "I love spicy food, True-crime marathons, and all things coffee")
Ask questions outside of the box to give someone something to respond to (examples: "What's the best place in town for a jalapeno margarita?" "What's the most embarrassing thing you binged watched during lockdown?")
Be mindful of your tone—are you looking for something casual or long-term? Are your photos reflecting that? I’m talking to you - ladies wearing lingerie in your pic and saying you’re looking for a relationship.
As always, be upfront with your intentions, stay safe & most importantly HAVE FUN!
With love,
Your Favorite Matchmaker
